A person’s cultural and genetic heritage is often very meaningful to them. It holds stories and ties to their ancestors, and also explains many aspects of their family. That’s why people put a lot of effort into finding out their roots and upholding the values associated with them.
One family who strongly believed that they were Italian got a huge shock when their in-law revealed the results of the DNA test her husband took. In that moment, their entire perception of who they were shifted, and they got very mad at her.
More info: Reddit
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The poster shared that her in-laws always believed that they were Italian and that that dictated their food, personality, jokes, and even slurs
When her husband did a DNA test, he found out that there was only 0.7% Italian heritage in his bloodline, and that it was mainly a mix of German and Spanish
The couple revealed this shocking news to the man’s grandparents, who took it sportingly, but when the rest of the family found out, they were furious
The poster even had to correct her in-laws about using Italian slurs, but they refused to change and made it clear they’d always be “Italian”
The poster shared that she always had to deal with her in-laws proclaiming how Italian they were. They let their heritage dictate their personality, choices, food, and jokes. So, the woman knew right from the start how important their cultural background was to them, which is why she was shocked when her husband took a DNA test.
To get an insight into why the family felt the way they did, We reached out to Amy Johnson Crow. She is the founder and lead educator at Generations Connection and is the host of the channel, ‘Genealogy with Amy Johnson Crow.’ She is the author of ‘31 Days to Better Genealogy’ and the creator of the ‘52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks’ writing challenge.
We asked Amy why people place so much importance on their genetic heritage. She said, “I think people confuse [it] with cultural heritage. I don’t know the specifics of this family, but there are instances where you could have a couple of generations in one country and your family ‘identifies’ with that heritage.”
“However, the genetics are looking back 1,000 years. Just being in a country for a couple of generations doesn’t give much opportunity for that DNA to get into the family. Even when the genetics do match where a family is from, I think the appeal of DNA tests points to the human condition of wanting to connect.”
“The DNA companies have made it look like all you have to do is give some spit and, poof, instant heritage. It misses the nuance of the realities of migration and what that DNA test is really showing,” she added. Therefore, it seems like the family might have misunderstood their grandparents’ background and ran with the idea of being Italian, just a bit too much.
The poster’s husband told his grandparents the truth about their heritage, and they took the news well. However, he was afraid of telling the rest of the family. Eventually, at a joint meal, they told everyone the news. Nobody could believe that they weren’t Italian, and they immediately began getting defensive.
Since the OP worked as a biologist, she tried to clear everyone’s doubts, but they still couldn’t accept the fact. The family also kept making Italian jokes and dropping slurs without thinking. It seems like the DNA revelation really rattled them and affected the way they perceived themselves, which is why it was so hard to accept.
We asked Amy whether it was right for the OP to reveal the information about the family DNA. She said, “Obviously, I don’t know the dynamics of this family, but it sounds like she gave the information at a good time, and even explained that siblings’ results can vary.”
“The ethnicity estimates from any company are the least useful and least reliable/accurate part of the test. If the family truly wanted to know their heritage, they really should look at the paper trail: that would tell them not only their origins, but also the stories of their ancestors. You won’t get that from just a DNA test,” she added.
When people believe in something for such a long time, the truth might be a hard pill to swallow. It’s good that the woman let them know about their heritage, but it’s not her responsibility to get them to accept the fact. Hopefully, they come to terms with what their real bloodline is and embrace it just as they did when they thought they were Italian.
Do you think the woman was right to reveal such a secret? Let us know your thoughts down below.
Netizens sided with the woman and felt that her in-laws needed a reality check
